Fog and Smog rolled out their new “rap” parody, one that parodies the current trend that sees bartenders becoming mixologists and a good $6 drink costing $20. It’s certainly worth a watch. If you’re not geeky enough to pause and check out the fake drinks that are on the menu, we’ll recap them for you. Because we have nothing but time.
· The Avon Barksdale: Hennessy, soda, free range heroin foam
· A Wilson’s Boulevard of Broken Dreams: Single mash Gatorade, bitters, Smirnoff ice, human tears
· Moist Yoga Mat: Hemp vodka, 12 year kombucha, wheatgrass with a coconut water back
· Hyphy Hangover: Grape 4 Loko, Peychaud bitters, thizz face
· Chewbacca’s Jacuzzi: Kashyyyk champagne, muddled slim jim, carbonite rinse
Check out the video below. If you’re curious, it was shot at LA bar La Descarga (which means “after the party.”) Think a too-cool-for-the-room pre-Castro Havana vibe, very cramped a super small footprint, burlesque dancers, $20 cocktails with shaved ice, cigars, and lots of expensive rum and you’ve got the idea. So just like the video then.
I have a very good friend whose brother wore a Budweiser themed hat during his high school homecoming. He ended up driving his father’s car into a chain link fence along the football field and rolled the trunk of the car up like a sardine can. Nice! You can imagine that went over very well with all involved.
Let’s say you’re not a drunk high school senior but an actual cowboy. Chances are you have some allegiance to an American beer of some sort or another. Now, you can show your allegiance to both cowboy culture and your favorite suds, with a Beer Box Cowboy Hat.
Constructed from an actual 18-pack, you can choose from Miller Lite, MGD, or Coors Light. You may drink with your hat on. You may drive with your hat on. Please do not combine the two.
Glazed Donut flavored vodka certainly exists – so dessert is covered. But what about something for dinner? Until we get Filet Mignon vodka, Naga Chilli Vodka just rolled out something to keep you busy. While it may not fill your stomach, it certainly has the potential to burn your face clean off. It’s not slightly hot – it’s in fact infused with one of the hottest chili peppers on the planet. Something that registers in at a face melting 100,000 Scoville units.
If you’ve ever wanted to pull off the drink-in-a-paper-bag bum aesthetic while still trying to keep your drink cool, inventors of such niceties as the brass knuckle coffee mugs and grenade salt and pepper shakers bring you the equally fun Bum Bag Drinks Cooler (actually not on the internet “shelves” until sometime in August.) We’d say it’s a great way to look like the 99% while still maintaining a cold temperature for your drink – just like any upper-crust lush expects.
The evil genius behind such a device is thabto (two heads are better than one) and while it may look the part of disposable bag – their drink cooler is water-resistant, tear-proof and made to look and feel like an actual paper bag. There’s no info on the actual dimensions just yet, but judging from the photos provided it seems like it will cover your average long-neck. Be advised that it leaves the neck exposed, so it won’t be keeping you safe from the police unless you live in Vegas. Pricing is set at £5.95 which works out to $9.22 (at current exchange rates) for us Yanks.
This enchantress is 36-year-old Valerie Marie Topete. She was arrested for her Nobel Laureate work pouring beer into her two-year-old son’s sippy cup at a Phoenix area pizzeria last week.
A witness at the scene called 911 when she saw the child fall out of his high chair, scared that he was intoxicated. According to the Phoenix police, Topete cemented her Mensa membership when her son reached for the beer on her table. Rather than doing what most of us would find natural, she instead poured some beer into her son’s sippy cup.
The Daily News reports that Topete supposedly poured just a “splash of beer” and mixed it with her son’s apple juice, hoping that reverse psychology would deter him from the taste of alcohol. Officers confirmed the beer content inside the cup and promptly arrested Topete on suspicion of child abuse. Topete’s son was later released to his father after a precautionary visit to the hospital.
Coffee makes a good portion of the world go around. It certainly makes Seattle buzz. Artist Ben Blake believes that “coffee inspires creativity.” I’d buy that. He uses that theory to celebrate coffee and coffee culture. Draw Coffee is his website, and Blake uses his wicked skills in typography and doodling to create clever illustrations of almost anything coffee-related. Check out some of his work below.